O heart why are you heavy?

My heart is heavy tonight. I don't know why... maybe because I have been surfing around at a few blogs that were recommended and read a cpl posts about the loss of a child. All of those emotions just flood back. There is no way of stopping them. Remembering the pain, the hurt, the emptiness. Thinking that our little one would be around 10 months right now. *sigh* But, I am so grateful for what Jesus has given me. I wouldn't trade this life of living for him for anything. So grateful for a wonderful best friend and hubby. He is my strength when I am down and out. He knows what to say and what to do to get my spirit lifted! Again, so glad Jesus has things in control...

Well, thought I would post, I was in a posting mood earlier :-/ Maybe later.



First off, thank you Liz for that link you provided me with. I haven't went to it yet but I will possibly tomorrow evening.

This evening I have been printing out forms for the IRS. I've gotta go get my finger prints done and I have to take around 14 forms with me! LOL I applied for a job that starts in February and got through the first step, now on to the second step. I do have to wait for my birth certificate though... Praying it comes before the 12th because that is why I go get my finger prints done and I have to have it!!! I did however run out of paper and need to get some tomorrow. Oh, the job I have applied for is Data Transcriber. I've got faith that things will work out. Jehovah Jireh.

A lot seems to be going on right now. There for a moment it seemed like nothing was happening but now tons of stuff is happening. We are wanting to get a house and are trying to get stuff together for that. Plus, I am searching for a new job. Hopefully, I do get on at that IRS... I'd love that pay and possibly time off while they don't need me. I am applying at Family Christian Bookstore tomorrow. They are having a job fair from 6 to 8! I will be headed that way with my resume after I get off at Convergys. Jesus, help me!!! Hopefully, my schedule is flexible enough for them. I'll let them know that I can work on Sundays but only from 1 to 5 due to church. They may understand. HAHA
Jehovah Jireh.

Hoping they have an insurance plan... regardless, I need to make a couple of doctor's appts and if it has to go on a credit card so be it ;) Sugar is dropped but it still needs to drop further, I am watching what I eat as much as I can without meds right now.
Jehovah Jireh.

Well, I should have been in bed 45 minutes ago so I guess I will say ~ Nite.



Okay so I am hoping that no one yells at me, in fact please don't yell at me. I'll just not appreciate it at this time. So, I am over here shedding some tears because of my stupidity. I really should have stayed part time at Walmart to keep the insurance. Honestly, how stupid am I. My sugar is REALLY high right now. I ran out of medicine and I haven't made it to the doctor for her to refill the prescription. I really have no control over what I am eating right now. I know I need to count the carbs and watch the portion control especially when not on meds. Am I doing that? No. *disappointed in myself*

So tomorrow is a new day and I have two choices to screw up or to start eating right. I've got to exercise too. I really need to find a buddy to do this with because I don't think I can do it on my own. LOL My hubby says he will but if I decide to do an exercise class or gym, I don't think he'll be joining me if it is all ladies ;)

The facts are that I know what I need to do and that I really need to do it because right this very second, I know that I don't want to leave this world due to not taking care of myself!!!! I've got to make an appointment and hope that my endocrinologist has after hours appts. Otherwise, I'll have to miss work and right now, my attendance can't afford that. And, pray that the bill isn't outrageous because of not having insurance.

What is funny is that with my sugar being this high, it is right now the highest I think I have every checked it out and I am so surprised that I am not feeling the affects of it being this high..... I could just use a miracle right now.


Peace, be still.

So today is the first Monday of the month and I already have a candle burning. Praying peace in the home as mentioned to do - join in with Courtney at Women Living Well.

Well I am at a friend's house with hubby fixing his computer! Hope everyone has a good evening!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone


Creating the Atmosphere

Not sure why I am inspired to write, maybe it is because of the challenge that is going over at Women Living Well this Fall! I am going to try my best to catch what she has to say this Monday and every Monday this month. She is going to be giving a physical challenge as well as a spiritual challenge. The first challenge physically for the home is to light a candle every day... I have been trying to do that lately... It is really strange that this is something that she is mentioning. But I am trying to create something in the atmosphere... a home-y feeling, a peace. Plus it makes the house smell good! :)

   /ˈætməsˌfɪər/ Show Spelled [at-muhs-feer] noun, verb, -a surrounding or pervading mood, environment, or influence:

Not only should we create this atmosphere in our homes but when it comes to spirituality, there should be an atmosphere created in us as well. I am hoping this fall that there is an influence of the Holy Ghost in my home.

Speaking of home, we are praying for God's will concerning purchasing a house. Please help us pray!


Thinking something shady goes on with certain companies....

Left work early yesterday because I was sick... Decided to stay home this morning. I am still not feeling that well but better than I was. Called Human Resources Direct about medical insurance and guess who didn't get to enroll in time (Because there wasn't an option to do so, and Convergys really didn't know about how to go about it because it is held by HR Direct.)? Me! (I am so upset.) And open enrollment is not until November and it wouldn't start until Jan 2011. So now there really isn't any use of staying at Convergys. I am needing to find another job quickly. So, I am going to be putting in some apps today and the rest of the week. Please bind with me that I find something.

I'll probably come on later and blog some more about what I am thinking about this whole Convergys insurance thing.


Monday -Leftovers
Tuesday- Turkey Chili and Cornbread
Wednesday-Three Cheese Chicken
Thursday- Pierogies and Montreal Chicken
Friday- Out of town-Eating out.

Some of the same meals from last week because we didn't eat according to the plan :) And went out to eat a few times.


Tiny Update

Been so busy lately it seems. Been sick too and it just gets overwhelming. Will try to update more in the next couple days...



So here is what it looks like for this week. Headed out for shopping in a bit.

Monday- Pizza and Salad

Tuesday- Mini Frito Meatloaves with Mashed Potatoes

Wednesday- Montreal Chicken Tenderloins and Pierogies

Thursday- Slow cooker Saucy Meatballs and Spaghetti/Garlic Bread

Friday- Pepperoni Roll-up with Sauce/Corn on the Cob

Saturday- Creamy Chicken & Rice

Sunday- Southwestern Turkey Chili and Cornbread

Now, we may just switch a couple of these around, I am not sure yet. But, this is the meal plan for this week. :)


Here I Go.

Started my endeavors in finding another job. Looking into retail again even though I don't really want to but I think I will like it alot more than where I am at. I applied at 3 Starbucks locations, McDonalds, and Borders. I am thinking about applying at Hot Head Burrito as well! Wish Me Luck!

I just know at this point in my life, the call center is not for me and God is going to help me find something.

It is 1:12AM and I have to work tomorrow. Too bad I couldn't take the next couple days off. I didn't feel good today (Wednesday) and called off. Stomach problems. Need to go to the doctor! UGH.

Going to bed. Nite.


Sitting at Starbucks

It is great you have people that actually read your blog. So, thank you to all those who read and those that comment.

I am sitting here at Starbucks in Tri-County Mall in Sharonville. My hubby went to work for a few hours. Hate that I am away from him on a Saturday but I am glad that he is able to get paid time and a half for it. :) I got me a Iced White Chocolate Mocha. YUM. But oh the sugar! I am so bad.

Sitting across from a Life Uniform store. It is rather busy too. I might take a look in there and see if they sale scrub skirts. Those are hard to come by. I really wouldn't mind working in the medical field. Really considering trying to find a job for the AM and then go to take some college classes - maybe get back into Phlebotomy. I don't know why I didn't consider it more after paying all the money that I did back in 2000. There was just a lot of events that took place that kinda turned me all around.

Hubby thinks he is going to leave work around 5. He just got there around 2:30. Only a few hours of working to try to help his boss, Jim. So, I will be leaving here in about 15 to 25 minutes. This mall is pretty big. I was bored walking around without him. So, we may or may not come back here after he gets off. He stated something about going to another mall. I should do some shopping. I didn't notice that alot of places have 50-60% off sales!

Well, that is all right now. Maybe later I'll write some more. However, I came up here to Sharonville knowing very well that I have 2 loads of laundry to do, dishes to wash, and tons of other stuff that can be done around the apartment!! I need to make a to-do list. Lord, help me to become a much better organized, dedicated woman.



Do you ever sit and wish that your dreams would unfold. Or wish you can talk about your feelings and let them all out? I don't think I would have enough time in the day to do so. So maybe I'll try to handle and talk about them one by one. But where to even begin. I don't know where the beginning is so don't even say "the beginning."


Fixed it.

Finally was able to fix my blog. I found that HTML that was hiding on me!!!
In the meantime, follow me if you haven't already!

Bad Day.

Today has been a day... everthing that could go wrong has. I am just not happy either. Leaving work almost in tears is not good. And it isn't like I have a hard job, I just have a hard time communicating with these people that call in. I don't think this job is for me at all. I need God to intervene and do something. I need direction!
Will someone say a prayer for me too. I think that I got overlooked on getting medical benefits and if that is the case, than I am really not sure why I am even sticking around this place.

BTW, I don't have the patience today to work on my blog. I can't figure out why there is still an issue with the template. I have looked every where on here and can't find where that background and old html is. UGH.


Messy Blog!

AHHHHH. Please excuse my blog - it is a mess. I can't get it to do what I want it to do. I can't find some of the html that is apparently stuck on here! I'll figure it out tomorrow and finish working on the template.


God only knows...

I am thinking that I haven't made the right choice for leaving Wal-mart and in another way I feel as if I couldn't stay there any longer and I am glad to be gone. Make sense? *sigh* Life's choices are so hard sometime. As soon as I got this job, I started witnessing even taking prayer clothes to people at work. So, I know God is moving at this time even if I don't understand where I am at.
Venturing out with my husband and starting a freelance business (more about this soon), hoping this takes us somewhere. God only knows. Trusting in him. I do think that I will start hunting and praying for something else in the meantime. I really would like a data entry job and not customer service/sales support like I am doing. I'd prefer to work by myself not having to talk with ppl except a boss. LOL

Well, that is what has been going on in my mind! Thank you all for your prayers concerning my cousin! I did get to go to the funeral and visit with some family members. Got to see my dad! :D Can't wait to go back up that way and spend more than a day and a half.


Long week and a half!

Been wondering where I have been? My cousin PJ died July 9 (overdosed) and the funeral was this past Thursday. Hubby and I got up at 4:30AM and were out of the house by 5:30 to drive up to WV for the funeral that was at 11. Stayed at my cousin's house Thursday and Friday night and came home on Saturday. Got in around 11PM and went to bed. Got up Sunday AM for Sunday School, spent the afternoon at lunch with friends, Tiffhanie and Chris. Sunday night church and came home staying up until 1AM. Woke up and had to be at work by 9 today..

Tired and headed to bed!



Work has me so upset tonight. I just wish I knew what these reps wanted when they call me. I really hate when someone calls in for the Finance part of it. I had two customers on the phone earlier today and they both kept me on the phone for a half hour and I barely talked because I didn't know what to say or do for them! I really want to find another job! I like Convergys don't get me wrong, but I know there is something better out there for me. Well, that is all. I was in a typing mood earlier when I was more upset. I probably should have typed then... Oh well. So glad it is Friday tomorrow. Hope my work day goes back quick.


Hope You Had A Wonderful 4th

I loved my 3 day weekend!
So, we went to our friend Jim's place yesterday after church (only one service because of the holiday.) Had a great time although it was extremely hot!! Spent from 2 to 10 outside and no sunburn! Thanks to my friend Becci for bringing her kids Waterbabies sunblock! Enjoyed all the fireworks and ended up hiding behind Becci while Jim's son hid behind me because a few of them came to close to contact after going off in the sky! We had a great turnout for the party.
Anyways, my 4th was great. Now, I have to get to sleep so that I can wake in the morning. 4 day week! Excited about this too!


3-day Weekend!

Updating from my phone tonight because I forgot to update before shutting my computer off for the night.
Was doing the dishes tonight and while doing them I ended up thinking about food. And then my mind got to thinking about my Mom's spaghetti. How I can remember it tasting. How she liked it done really well and how she liked thin spaghetti. Then, all of a sudden I start bawling.
It was funny how such a little thought triggered an emotion. I miss her! And I miss my little guy that I lost one year n a month ago.
Three day weekend coming up! Work tomorrow and then off until Tues. I had a notion to go visit my dad and whoever wanted to visit with me could come over but don't think that will happen. Wish it would work out that way though.
Nite all.



Little update on my Wednesday.

I am tired! Got my coaching for this week at work today and was so happy that it actually went well. I really need to work on eliminating dead air and reinstating the issue... Hopefully I can do that starting tomorrow!

Bro. Jim preached the Bible Study tonight at church and it was great!

One young lady got baptized tonight too.

I'd say more but I am exhausted! Good Nite.

How Far Is Too Far To Dream

So, today work was horrible to me. I just felt like I couldn't get the script down. My calls were too long! I had several calls that were 15 minutes to an hour long! Not to mention after being there for 2 hours, I felt like I had already been there all 8 hours long! *sigh* Not good not good at all! I really wish I could find a job where I hardly have to talk to anyone. Yes, I love talking to ppl and I like customer service jobs. I mean I was a customer service supervisor for over 5 years at just one store and for a cpl years at another store. BUT, I love working by myself because I think I get a whole lot done. What would be the perfect job for me if I can't just stay home and cook, clean and organize this place? Ideas anyone? haha

By now, you should know that I am as random as they come. Here goes.
We had tacos tonight and they were so good. I am still stuffed and we ate several hours ago. I think that I totally ate too many. Not going to let you in on how many either. Told my hubby that I am gonna start using my apps on the iPhone that I downloaded to control weight loss. I may even post about the weight loss. I need to lose at least 11 lbs by August 17th. Wonder if I can do it!

Well, I am still trying to get this blog the way I want it! Maybe that is what will remind me to come back each day to blog. So, for your sake you might not want me to ever get it the way I want it!

I am ready to dream big and see some of those dreams come true.

Lots on my mind tonight and don't I wish I could sit here all night long and just blog away. But I have to go to work in the morning.

Have a happy day 2morrow!


Stars and Chilies: Monday's quietness can be loud…

Thank you so much!! :) Sorry it has taken so long to respond. I just now noticed the nomination! :)

Versitile Blogger Award!

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That is right! I won this pretty little award from V! I won this back in MAY! And I am just now noticing it. See, I really should blog more. I do enjoy it when I do blog. Why don't I do it more often... Grr! I love what she had to say about me. I am so glad I was able to provide some giggles and laughs!

Well, with winning it I have some things I must do!

Thank you so much V! Everyone go visit V and say "Hello!"

So secondly, 7 things about me!

  • New JOB - like it so far.

  • I turn 31 this year. Where did 22-30 go? I would like to know!!

  • I am a really bad blogger. I used to be so good at it. On top of it and lately I just forget about it. Even with it in my "bookmarks toolbar"

  • Actually have time to read now at work, so I started back reading a book that I put down for months! Almost done with it and then on to Book 3 in the Series! Yay!

  • Can't wait until hubby and I can take a vacation. He just took a week Staycation and I had to work. Can you say NOT Fair?

  • I am thinking anywhere would be nice.

  • I'd love to go to Gatlinburg again since last year when we went we weren't really focused on things. It was just to get away from it all and to rest from just having lost our son :(

Don't want to leave those on a bad note... So let me just say the 8th thing is: The Lord Almighty Reigneth! :)

I must nominate 10 (at most) Blogs for this award.

I am only going to choose a few.
1. Mrs Lemon at Lemonade Living.
I know Mrs Lemon in real life... She is a wonderful lady! She has 3 adorable Children! And she had a great love for God and music ministry at church. Visit her!

2. Mrs. Tim @ Move Over Martha, Mommy Coming Through
She is so frugal! She has another blog that she posts all of her coupon savings and such on. She is a great read!

3. Carolyn @ A Cuppy Cake Life
She posts alot about cupcakes but just not that! She has Freedom Friday posts and posts about March for Dimes... show her some love. Check out those cupcakes. I want to make those Rocky Road ones for my husband!!!

4. Jaime over at The Happy Life Of A Happy Wife has some great posts. She just went on vacation and is due for her little one in about 3 months.

5. Visit "The Young Pastor's Wife" - This blog is by Jaqueline. You can find anything from family, finances , inspiration, hair styling for long hair and her weightloss journey. Love this blog and you will find something that you like on it.

6. Courtney at WomenLivingWell! She has many things going on over here! Check her out. I have gotten some great ideas from her and she has taught me a few things!

Well it is time for me to go to bed! But, I must go on and post that they've been nominated before I can run off to that great mattress of mine! Oh, BTW, I changed the layout! Kinda cute... I think I made my header too plain though!


Getting some great ideas for this blog... just too late to work on them tonight!



Broken Promises.

Okay, I know I have said this before, but I am really going to try to NOT break my promise this time. I am going to revamp my blogger a bit and then start posting regularly if it kills me! LOL

Maybe I'll do what other do and make each day of the week a topic of some sort... like Bible Scripture Friday or Meal Planning Monday... you get the point... We will see...

Now, off to think about some ideas on the revamp...


Feeling Inspired To Blog Tonight

Haha. I should blog so much more often, I know. Both my husband and I are laying here on the bed with our computers. He is doing his 8 Page Essay for New Testament Survey and I am just chillin by him. I've been to several other blogs and read them.. so I figured that I would go ahead blog myself.

So, today started out with me getting ready, leaving and starting work at 7:30. Did I mention that today was my last day working for Wal-Mart! "Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, I am free at last!" To take a quote from Martin Luther King. I worked until about 11:15 today. Not bad considering I was just going to not show up for my last day. Haha... Hey, it really wasn't my idea but my husband's. The front-end zone manager asked me to at least come in and work a half of a day... so that is why I did it. There were sweet good byes and some tears shed. But, they will see me around because I will be shopping...

Tomorrow starts a new beginning. A new job. I will be working for Convergys. My position title is Customer Service and Problem Resolution Representative II. Pretty long of a title, huh? I like it and hope I enjoy it. I am hoping that training will be easy and informative. I hope to catch on quickly. I will learn everything about the position and what benefits I have and other things tomorrow in orientation. I have to be there at 8!

Anyways, after I left work I came home and took a short nap... okay it was about an hour long. Hubby and I got up and went to Chipotle for lunch. One of my favorite places... Did I mention that he called off work today to finish working on his essay... He is bad. But, at least he will complete it and be able to turn it in! We came home for a bit and then his mom called us. She asked first was gonna ask how my first day at Convergys went but realized that today was Thursday and not Friday. She told us that Grandma Marge was moved to hospice and that we should go visit because she is only given a day to a couple of weeks to live. So keep our family in your prayers. We got ready and left the apartment to go visit her. She was in a pretty weak state and didn't open her eyes up. We stayed there for about 20 minutes. I hated seeing her like that.

We left and headed back here to the apartment but before that we went to Starbucks and grabbed some Frappuccinos... White Chocolate Mocha for me and a Vanilla Bean Creme for him.

Did I mention that today was payday for me and we probably spent most of all of it today. I made a payment on our car and then we bought the Baja Convert-A-Couch Sofa Sleeper... It is nice. We mainly bought it today so that we could get a discount on it. But we were going to get it anyway. It will come in handy when my Dad comes down for a visit next month! That is when he is planning on coming down. Yay.

Well, I hope I didn't bore you... Have a great night. I now have to go read some new hire papers for tomorrow... Just so I can be informed.


Nervous and Excited

So, I have an interview tomorrow... Well, I am going in for an interview and hoping that they will interview me on the spot. My friend that works for the company gave me the heads up to just come by. If I get this job, training is said to possibly start on Friday. So, I'll be quitting my current job. This makes me excited because I currently can't stand it... well, I haven't been able to stand it for a very long time. I am nervous that I won't be able to say the right stuff. You know all of those jitters that come along with interviewing!

I also have blood work in the morning! Checking of the A1C that should have been done a month ago... Nervous for that appt that is coming up on the 29th with my endocrinologist because she wanted me to lose 20 lbs by the next time I saw here and I think that I have lost nothing. Well, maybe I did lose one or two pounds... but her goal... NO :( I am hoping that my tests come back better than the last time I had them done.

So, I'll get up in the morning... get a shower, get dressed and go get blood work done and then come back home probably and get dressed up for the interview, eat, and then go over for the interview.

Wish me luck! and say some prayers!


Tax Day

Well, I feel awful! I am sick. I am not sure if it is allergies or not but it started a few days ago! Also, think it may be a stomach virus since that is going around at Walmart right now. Speaking of Walmart, because I took this past Saturday off I was taken to the next level of coaching. I got a D-day. Aka Decision-making Day. I haven't written up an appeal so to speak with action plan on how to correct me missing days of work. However, I know that I have to do so. I have slept most of the day away because I am sick. I am actually pretty glad that I was given today off with pay because of the way that I feel. I woke up around 10 and took a shower and then played on the computer a bit and also made me something to eat. About 3, I laid back down and fell asleep and didn't wake up until my wonderful husband called me to let me know he was on his way home. I hung up the phone and fell back to sleep. Got up around 7... sat at the computer for 1 1/2 hours and then we went to Chipotle to eat! Stopped off at Remke and got some ice cream... hoping that makes me feel better a little later!

So, I am off tomorrow... and I am so glad for that too... It isn't a paid day off unlike today. I am hoping to get my action plan written to give to personnel on Saturday morning. I really hope that I am not as sick on Saturday. I hate working when I am sick. I can't give my 100% or more. You'd think that they would care but they are careless! Oh well. I am trying to find something else. Sad because I have been with them for 5 years next month and I could move up if I wanted too. But I don't. I have no desire to do so.

So it is Tax Day! Oh, and I am so glad that we got our taxes done and out of the way! I mailed them out yesterday. It is pretty sad that we had to pay in so much! I hate it. But with us saving over the year and with money that we did get back from OH (Hubby works in OH) we broke about even! Praise God.

Will most likely blog tomorrow! All depends on how I feel... keep me in your prayers!


Follow Friday! cont. of the UBP!

Follow Friday is usually a twitter thing however I am visiting some blogs today... I am sure I will visit more than 20! Hope you joined the Party... It is going from the 9th to the 16th! So go ahead and follow this ppl!

I am going to be using a layout from KeyLime soon! :)

I visited Christine's Corner in hopes that I'll get more inspiration in digital scrapping more.

Main Element Love Great tips on this page!!! and you can by some homemade stuff for your skin!

Blackberry Jam Cafe

You've got to love what she does... Takes a portrait of your choosing and hand draws it! She is always doing a giveaway this week!

Christine joined in the party... give her a visit too!

Cakeblast: A DadBlog Featuring Reviews and Giveaways
Found his blog interesting... Hoping to catch up with some of his reviews and giveaways. Plus how often do you hear of many men bloggers!

Can someone say CUPCAKE? Hallelujah!!!! Following this blog definitely! A Cuppycake Life

Christian Moms Business Resource Blog!!! Enough said! Visit it!

Rediscovering Domesticity Check her out... You may want to send her a funnel cake too! ;)

Polka Spot Farm Doing a giveaway from Blis... It would be nice to win... check them out.

Visit I Dream Of Clean. She has only been up for about 3 weeks but gotta love it! She is also doing giveaways.

Scraps of Life Interesting Blogger... She is giving away 2 Cookbooks! She has other giveaways too :)

A virtual hobby store and coffee shop! Check her out... this post will keep you interested...

Living in Amazing Grace

Simply Staci Check her out.

Meet Karen...

Frugally Fabulous Mom

Visit Camie

Cassie is partying too over at Southern Domestic Goddess!

Visit Kim HERE

Some of these ppl I hope to include their buttons on my blog as way to let you all know that you should be reading their blogs... Right now, this will do as to tell you who I visited today! Well, I am off to visit some more, I think I started and now I can't stop! Join in the party! And visit all these wonderful ppl!

Have a great day! God bless you!


Let's Party!

Okay so I was going to make a big deal about this being my 100th post... but instead Let's Party!

Ultimate Blog Party 2010
I am joining the ladies at and partying... Ultimate Blog Party 2010 Will you join in? :) Hopefully, you will enjoy this blog and I will meet new blogging friends...

So, what about myself is so interesting? I am glad you are asking because I am still discovering this myself. I am a full-time supervisor at Walmart right now. Passionately seeking employment elsewhere. I am a preacher's wife of Travis. We've been married for 5 years 4 months! He is wonderful and a great man of God! We lost a baby back in June of 2009... I miss him... I'll post more about this... and I have a few posts about it... I am by no means an expert in parenting but consider myself as :Mom:

Oh, there are so many wonderful prizes to win... I would love a chance to win US18, US39 or US40 :)

I am going to try my hardest to blog more... So, let's get this party started.. comment, I would love to meet you and read your blog!


Okay, I am about to post an article that I read online... I am doing Children's church tonight and I am doing it on Love... in research I came across this article and liked what it had to say... Even though, I am not using anything from it on my lesson... Ha... Enjoy. Figured it is timely since Valentine's day is this Sunday.

Four Characteristics Of Love
1 Corinthians 13:5

The prodigal son had a proud brother, who was a self-righteous moralist. He never did the evil things the prodigal did. He carefully maintained the appearance of fidelity to his father. But his religion and morality was only a covering to hide the wickedness of his heart. When the prodigal was recovered, his brother's wickedness came to light. He saw all that was being done for the prodigal upon his return to the father's house and got so mad he would not go in himself. He said, to his father,"Lo, these many years do I serve thee, neither transgressed I at anytime thy commandment: and yet thou never gavest me a kid, that I might make merry with my friends" (Lk. 15:29).

What a pitiful sight! Here is a grown man acting like a spoiled two year old! He was saying, "I feel slighted and neglected, and I deserve better." All that he said and did revealed nothing but pride and love of self. He had no love for his father or his brother. He loved himself, and no one else.

How many there are like this man today. They never visit the sick. But if they get sick, they expect the world to stop spinning so that everyone will come to them. They never show care for anyone else. But if someone fails to show care for them they are offended. They never have a kind word for anyone. But if someone neglects to say "good day" to them they feel abused.

God's people do not behave so! God's saints do not seek for others to serve them, they seek to serve. In lowliness of mind they esteem each one better than themselves and look not on their own needs but on the needs of others (Phil. 2:3-4). Grace makes people loving. And love is disinterested in self. Love always has these four characteristics:

1. "LOVE DOTH NOT BEHAVE ITSELF UNSEEMLY." Love is never scornful,arrogant and uncaring.It does not ignore its object. 2."LOVE SEEKETH NOT HER OWN." Love does not seek personal recognition, honor or favor. It seeks to heap these things upon others. 3. "LOVE IS NOT EASILY PROVOKED." Love puts things in the best light possible. It is not easily offended. 4. "LOVE THINKETH NO EVIL." Love does not think evil of its object.It is not suspi - cious. Even when evil is done, love presumes that none was intended. In a word, love seeks not to be loved, but to love. May God teach us so to love one another.

Don Fortner