O heart why are you heavy?

My heart is heavy tonight. I don't know why... maybe because I have been surfing around at a few blogs that were recommended and read a cpl posts about the loss of a child. All of those emotions just flood back. There is no way of stopping them. Remembering the pain, the hurt, the emptiness. Thinking that our little one would be around 10 months right now. *sigh* But, I am so grateful for what Jesus has given me. I wouldn't trade this life of living for him for anything. So grateful for a wonderful best friend and hubby. He is my strength when I am down and out. He knows what to say and what to do to get my spirit lifted! Again, so glad Jesus has things in control...

Well, thought I would post, I was in a posting mood earlier :-/ Maybe later.



First off, thank you Liz for that link you provided me with. I haven't went to it yet but I will possibly tomorrow evening.

This evening I have been printing out forms for the IRS. I've gotta go get my finger prints done and I have to take around 14 forms with me! LOL I applied for a job that starts in February and got through the first step, now on to the second step. I do have to wait for my birth certificate though... Praying it comes before the 12th because that is why I go get my finger prints done and I have to have it!!! I did however run out of paper and need to get some tomorrow. Oh, the job I have applied for is Data Transcriber. I've got faith that things will work out. Jehovah Jireh.

A lot seems to be going on right now. There for a moment it seemed like nothing was happening but now tons of stuff is happening. We are wanting to get a house and are trying to get stuff together for that. Plus, I am searching for a new job. Hopefully, I do get on at that IRS... I'd love that pay and possibly time off while they don't need me. I am applying at Family Christian Bookstore tomorrow. They are having a job fair from 6 to 8! I will be headed that way with my resume after I get off at Convergys. Jesus, help me!!! Hopefully, my schedule is flexible enough for them. I'll let them know that I can work on Sundays but only from 1 to 5 due to church. They may understand. HAHA
Jehovah Jireh.

Hoping they have an insurance plan... regardless, I need to make a couple of doctor's appts and if it has to go on a credit card so be it ;) Sugar is dropped but it still needs to drop further, I am watching what I eat as much as I can without meds right now.
Jehovah Jireh.

Well, I should have been in bed 45 minutes ago so I guess I will say ~ Nite.



Okay so I am hoping that no one yells at me, in fact please don't yell at me. I'll just not appreciate it at this time. So, I am over here shedding some tears because of my stupidity. I really should have stayed part time at Walmart to keep the insurance. Honestly, how stupid am I. My sugar is REALLY high right now. I ran out of medicine and I haven't made it to the doctor for her to refill the prescription. I really have no control over what I am eating right now. I know I need to count the carbs and watch the portion control especially when not on meds. Am I doing that? No. *disappointed in myself*

So tomorrow is a new day and I have two choices to screw up or to start eating right. I've got to exercise too. I really need to find a buddy to do this with because I don't think I can do it on my own. LOL My hubby says he will but if I decide to do an exercise class or gym, I don't think he'll be joining me if it is all ladies ;)

The facts are that I know what I need to do and that I really need to do it because right this very second, I know that I don't want to leave this world due to not taking care of myself!!!! I've got to make an appointment and hope that my endocrinologist has after hours appts. Otherwise, I'll have to miss work and right now, my attendance can't afford that. And, pray that the bill isn't outrageous because of not having insurance.

What is funny is that with my sugar being this high, it is right now the highest I think I have every checked it out and I am so surprised that I am not feeling the affects of it being this high..... I could just use a miracle right now.


Peace, be still.

So today is the first Monday of the month and I already have a candle burning. Praying peace in the home as mentioned to do - join in with Courtney at Women Living Well.

Well I am at a friend's house with hubby fixing his computer! Hope everyone has a good evening!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone


Creating the Atmosphere

Not sure why I am inspired to write, maybe it is because of the challenge that is going over at Women Living Well this Fall! I am going to try my best to catch what she has to say this Monday and every Monday this month. She is going to be giving a physical challenge as well as a spiritual challenge. The first challenge physically for the home is to light a candle every day... I have been trying to do that lately... It is really strange that this is something that she is mentioning. But I am trying to create something in the atmosphere... a home-y feeling, a peace. Plus it makes the house smell good! :)

   /ˈætməsˌfɪər/ Show Spelled [at-muhs-feer] noun, verb, -a surrounding or pervading mood, environment, or influence:

Not only should we create this atmosphere in our homes but when it comes to spirituality, there should be an atmosphere created in us as well. I am hoping this fall that there is an influence of the Holy Ghost in my home.

Speaking of home, we are praying for God's will concerning purchasing a house. Please help us pray!